The Pregnancy Blecks

All my pregnancies have been very different. With Treefrog, I found out immediately (cause I was watching the calendar like a hawk) and played up every little symptom I had. Or so it seems now (I'll address this later). I was sick (literally - on antibiotics at least once each trimester), I was tired, I was so very bad at being pregnant. I had an awful attitude. Even though I wanted to be pregnant, I didn't like the out-of-control feeling . . . maybe this is a pattern in my life. I gave birth to Treefrog in a non-emergency, but "very fast," c-section due to his heart condition found shortly after birth.

Two years later, I was pregnant with Fish for a couple months before finding out. We were trying, but I was much too busy chasing Treefrog around to notice a late period. The tiredness was there. Oh boy, I relished the two hour naptime Treefrog took! The crankiness was there somewhat, but all around, the pregnancy was different. I was nauseated this time, but only for about two weeks. This pregnancy was, well, easy. I carried Fish until I went into labor on my own nine days before his due date. I labored for about 12 hours and then had a c-section for lack of progress.

Fast forward two more years and I find myself pregnant again. We were definitely trying, but had not expected to get pregnant this early (with both previous pregnancies it took us 3 and 4 months to have success). I knew when implantation happened (mostly because my friend J was with me, telling me that's what was going on in my body). From implantation on (or so it seems), I have been sick - nauseated sick. I will have a couple of good days and then, much like today, it will hit me head-on. Sleeping sometimes helps. Sometimes eating something with a healthy does of good fat (cheese quesadilla or peanut butter sandwich for instance) helps. Sometimes no matter what I try, I end up feeling sick the entire day. This pregnancy makes me realize that I was such a whiny-pants during the first pregnancy! This pregnancy makes me look back wistfully at my second one. This pregnancy makes me want to crawl into a hole and wait there until the baby decides to come out, or until the scheduled c-section, whichever comes first.

Don't get me wrong, though. I'm very happy to be welcoming child number three into our home. I'm very blessed with the type of husband who is in love with being around to help (see yesterday's post). I'm superbly blessed with in-laws who take one or both of the boys each weekend to ensure a good night's rest for both Ben and I. Every once in a while, though, it is just nice to complain:)

The Evening Routine

Ben and I have come to a bit of an agreement, without it ever actually being spoken. It is nice, yet, at times, I am nervous that it will blow up in my face. Basically the agreement is that Ben has the kids after dinner.

For a solid hour or longer.

By himself.

As in, I rarely do anything but call out, "Isn't it bedtime yet?!"

He is truly amazing, this man of mine. He comes home between meetings everyday to help out. He schedules many meetings around family times (such as lunch and dinner). He is usually home and happy to put Fish down for his afternoon snooze. He makes so many sacrifices throughout the day to be with us. I know that he likes this flexibility in his job (believe me, we have some pretty late nights built in to each week, so the job isn't as wonderful as it may seem at first glance. However, it definitely fits us for now). I know that he would do anything for his family, for me. . . I just sometimes wonder when it will be too much.

When will he say, "Uh-uh. I'm done. I've been picking up your slack for years. No more. Either pull it together or say goodbye to Mister Nice-guy." Will he ever look back at this time and wish for more? More "off" time, more down time, more clean towels, more time to fish? I hope he knows how much the time in the evenings means to me, but even more than that, how much he means to me. How much I appreciate his work sacrifices in order to be a more central part of our family. How much I appreciate his every dish washed, his every load of laundry done, his every floor swept, his every kid bathed. Oh, how I hope, one day, to show him that he is worth his weight in the purest gold possible.

For now, I guess morning sex will have to do.

I love you, Babe.

T-Day Count Down

I started a list last week of what we will be serving for Thanksgiving. I'm not sure why this year I'm so overwhelmed and feel the need to control every detail so much, but it is what it is. So, my list.

I have turkey (for carnivores) with stuffing, tofurkey (for us vegetarians, okay, I mean for me), green beans, cauliflower-broccoli gratin, macaroni salad (2 kinds b/c my dad is very picky), deviled eggs, stuffing muffins (again mainly for the vegetarians, but everyone devours them), rolls, and cranberry sauce. Dessert will be pumpkin pie (made from scratch!) and friendship bread.

Since I've been looking at this list for a week, I, naturally, felt the need to make another list for this upcoming week. This list was more like a chart, with a list for each day leading up to and including Thanksgiving Day. It shows what I need to make each day so that I will have enough oven space on the big day. I did, however, draw a very fine-looking turkey on my chart to make it a little more festive for those who might see it hanging on my cabinet in the kitchen. It's all in the details, people.

Anywho, I'm finally feeling a little better about next week and all the details coming into place. I'm actually excited to be hosting Thanksgiving and not too worried about what the state of my house will look like when people come through the door. I'm hoping I don't start worrying about the cleanliness of my house, though, because I don't think I have room in my kitchen for another chart.

I've Been Dipping Balls in Chocolate All Day

Oh, hello, pervs - it's not that kind of post. You can feel free to meander through my posts, but I'm pretty boring, really.

So, back to the balls into chocolate. A few weeks ago, one of Ben's RAs was around and she was telling us of this delightful dessert that her mom used to make that involved peanut butter, Rice Krispies cereal, and chocolate. I had her send me the recipe and I tried it out today. Staff meeting is in roughly one hour and I still have peanut butter-Rice Krispies balls that need dipped! The recipe makes a TON of those suckers!!!!

I hope the staff enjoys this, cause I'll never be making them again.

The end.

VomitFest 2008

That is where I have been for the past few days. Now, as we attempt to recapture some since of normalcy, I have shut myself in the office to seek some solace off the Internet.

This is a lame post. I wanted to be so much more eloquent with explaining how hard these past five or so days have been and what a disaster this morning has been so far, but I can't muster it. Maybe that's a good thing. Maybe instead, I should focus on the good.

Treefrog wanted to do school today, specifically the letter 'l.' So we did - screw the plans!

Fish loves when we get markers out and every time I turned my back he was up on top of the table, marker in hand (or mouth more often), attempting to do school with us.

Now, I need to go play with my children like I promised them I would.